The Supplement of Self- Control
II Peter 1:4-7
Introduction: Daniel Akst in a secular article called,
"Whose in Charge Here?" wrote:
"Life in modern Western
cultures is like living at a giant all-you-can-eat buffet offering more
calories, credit, sex, intoxicants, and just about anything else one could take
to excess than our forebears might ever have imagined. With more possibilities
for pleasure and fewer rules and constraints than ever before, the happy few
will be those able to exercise self-control."
It
is so true of what Daniel Akst has said about life in modern Western culture,
but it is not only limited to the West, we see this phenomenon all over the
world. A call for self-control goes out more often than it is practiced. If we are
honest with ourselves we all could take some help when it comes to having
self-control. We have been on a journey to discover a pathway to spiritual
wholeness, wellness and productivity. We have been following a series titled,
“Seven Supplements to Your Faith,” based on the second letter of the Apostle
Peter, 2 Peter 1: 5-7 “For this very reason, make every effort to add to your
faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and
to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to
godliness, mutual affection; and to mutual affection, love.”
So
far, we have learned that God supplies faith to us freely. By His grace and
through our faith in Christ alone we are saved. Faith in Christ is not an end
in itself, but just the beginning. The Apostle Peter encouraged the early
Christians to supplement to their faith goodness, to goodness, knowledge. We
looked at these two supplements more in depth the last two weeks. Today we will look into the supplement of self-control.
It is not a flashy concept or an attractive idea. Preachers won't become
popular when they preach on it, yet it is so important that we must not
overlook the subject, so let’s get started with answering the question what is
self-control?
I.SELF-CONTROL,
WHAT IS IT?
Let’s
look at what it is not first. Have you ever opened a bag of chips took one or
two then in no time finished the entire bag, that is lack of self-control! Have
you walked through Macy's or Sears kept picking up clothes though you didn’t
need them but then charged it to your credit card, that’s lack of self-control!
Have you ever lost your cool over a trivial matter and kept yelling at your
loved ones that is lack of self-control! I could go on... you get the point,
right?
What is self-control then?
Self-control is the ability to control oneself, in particular one's emotions
and desires or the expression of them in one's behavior, especially in
difficult situations. It is to say enough- is enough! It is to stop yourself
from doing things you want to do but that might not be in your best interest or
others. Who needs self-control? If we care to admit, we all need it in one area
or the other, if we want to be productive and successful in life.
In
the passage we read, Peter was urging early Christians to exercise self-control
because at that time many false teachers were misleading people saying,
self-control is unnecessary all you need is knowledge, whereas according to
Peter Christian knowledge leads to self-control. Self-control literally means “holding oneself
in.” In Peter’s day, self-control was used of athletes, who were to be
self-restrained and self-disciplined. Similarly, a disciple of Christ is called
to control the flesh, passions and bodily desires rather than allowing himself
to be controlled by them.
We
will be entering into a forty-day lent season beginning February 14, (Ash
Wednesday concluding on March 29). This is a good time for us to pause, take a
stock of our lives and see where perhaps we need to exercise self-control and
self-restraint.
For
now, I invite you to look with me, at the implications of a life that lacks
self-control, what the Bible says about self-control and the end times, can
self-control be taught, and how can we cultivate self-control?
II.
THE IMPLICATIONS OF LACK OF SELF-CONTROL
God
has given all of us certain natural appetites, they are the appetite to eat,
drink, sleep and to have sex. We are to control those appetites rather than other
way around. It’s like putting a rein over our appetites and control them,
otherwise they will ride over us. Some research tells us how devastating life
can be when we lack self-control. (Knoch & Fehr, 2007): The self-control theory of crime, tells us
that the lack of individual self-control is the main factor behind criminal
behavior. Lack of self-control leads to selfishness.
Scriptures
are very clear about the consequences of a life that lacks self-control.
Proverbs 25:28, “Like a city whose walls are broken through is a person who
lacks self-control.” In ancient times the cities were built with a wall around
them. For example, the city of Jericho and the city of Jerusalem. The walls are
there to protect the residents from the invasion of wild animals, thieves and
their enemies. Hence these walls were tightly guarded and protected. When they
are broken down, the inhabitants are exposed to all kinds of vulnerabilities
and they live in insecurity, fear and danger.
Similarly,
self-control acts as a defensive wall in our lives. When we lack self-control
in the area of food and eat any and everything, that defensive wall of immunity
breaks down making way for the “free radicals” to attack our health. When we
don't have self-control over negative emotions such as anger and sadness they
can have adverse effects on our well-being.
We must also exercise
self-restraint in the area of sexuality. In a time where there are so many
illicit relationships, infidelity and affairs, all those who are aspiring to be
married or currently married, have an awesome responsibility to rein in our
sexual desires. We need to honor the sanctity and integrity of marriage lest we
come under God’s judgment. Hebrews 13:4“Marriage should be honored by all, and
the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually
immoral.”
But
on the other hand, when we do exercise temperance, another word for
self-control we will be doing a favor to ourselves and to our loved ones. A
person who is self-controlled is a pleasant to be around and to live with. Can
you imagine how many fights could have been averted, marriages and families
spared from heartache, if only people could control their anger?
If you want to keep yourself out of
trouble pay attention to these wise words of Solomon:
Proverbs 15:1, “A gentle answer
turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” An antidote to anger and
arrogance can be found in Proverbs 16th chapter. Here are a couple of verses:
Proverbs 16:24, “Gracious words are like a honeycomb. sweetness to the soul and health to the body.
Proverbs 16:32, “Whoever is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who
rules his spirit than he who takes a city.” Lack of self-control is one of the
signs of the end times.
III.
SELF-CONTROL AND THE END TIMES
The
Apostle Paul warns his young disciple Timothy about the Last Days. II Timothy
3:1-5, “But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days. 2 People
will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud...without love,
unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good,
treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure... having a form of godliness
but denying its power. Have nothing to do with such people.”
I
Peter 4:7, “The end of all things is near. Therefore, be alert and of sober
mind so that you may pray.” I Peter 5: 8-11, “Be self-controlled and vigilant
always, for your enemy the devil is always about, prowling like a lion roaring
for its prey. Resist him, standing firm in your faith and remember that the
strain is the same for all your fellow-Christians in other parts of the world.”
(J.B. Phillips New Testament). These and many other scriptures highlights the
importance of self-control in the life of a believer, but how are we to
cultivate self-control?
IV.
CULTIVATING SELF-CONTROL
We
talked a lot about self-control from the world’s and scriptural point of view,
but can self-control be learned and taught? We will ask an expert, “Marshmallow
man” Walter Mischel is an Ivy League professor known for his experiments in
self-control. Nearly 50 years ago, he created a test to see how various
five-year-olds would respond to being left alone with a marshmallow for 15
minutes with instructions not to eat it — and with the promises that if they
didn’t, they would be given two. Famously, preschoolers who waited longest for
the marshmallow went on to have higher SAT scores than the ones who couldn’t
wait. In later years they were thinner, earned more advanced degrees, used less
cocaine, and coped better with stress.
As
these first marshmallow kids now enter their 50s, Mr. Mischel and colleagues
are investigating whether the good delayers are richer, too. Now Mischel eighty
and wants to make sure that the nervous parents of self-indulgent children
don’t miss his key finding: “Whether you eat the marshmallow at age 5 isn’t
your destiny. Self-control can be taught.”
Self-control
is easier said than done, however I would suggest a couple of ways that might
be helpful in cultivating self-control. It begins with honesty and a
determination. We need to honestly face and answer these sets of questions:
First set of questions: what am I a slave to? Food? Lust? Power? Money? The
Past? Drugs? Alcohol? Bitterness? Jealousy? Anger? List can go on these deal
with what is having a grip on our lives, and the things that we like to work
on.
The
second set of questions: What do I have to say “no” to right now? What do I
have to say “yes” to right now? Where/how do I better incorporate the fruits
into my life? These questions deal with on or two things you can actually to
work on and take responsibility.
Once we face and answer these
questions honestly, then we need to confess to the lord and ask him his
forgiveness of the sins we may have committed due to lack of self-control.
Remember
God is faithful, when we confess he will forgive and cleanse us from our sin
and give us another chance to live rightly.
With a forgiven heart now, we will find a trusted friend or a confidant
to hold us accountable and walk with us as we work through our challenges.
You may be saying, Pastor it is
hard work to develop self-control in my life.
I
hear you, yes, it is indeed hard work, but remember Christ has done the hardest
work, by going to the cross on your behalf. He offered His life as a sacrifice
so that you and I can walk away from our bondage to sin and live as free
people. He adopted us into His family of committed brothers and sisters who
once were sinners but saved by grace. By being part of such a family we can
work together, hold each other accountable, spur one another to good works and
challenge one another not to give up but to hold on to our faith. Moreover,
Jesus deposited His Holy Spirit inside of us. As we learn to listen, and obey
the gentle promptings of the Holy Spirit, by His strength we will be able to
cultivate self-control which is part of the fruit of the Holy Spirit. Amen
