FOUR THINGS LOVE DOES NOT DO
Introduction:
In
our Interfaith clergy meetings, we allotted five minutes for each clergy to do
their check-ins, where we share how we are personally doing and our
congregations. I shared a few aspects of Love being patient and kind. It is not
jealous, boastful, proud, or rude. I said we have to put our name in place of
Love, and that would lead us to self-evaluation.
A Catholic priest resonated with
that as he too preached on Love this past Sunday. He noted how our society
needs loving people who are patient, kind, and not rude to others. Can you
imagine a world without rudeness, where everyone is patient and kind with one
another? Would that be possible? That was what Paul might have envisioned in
his first letter to the Corinthians.
We have been working through this
all-time great chapter on Love for several weeks. By the end of our study, I
hope we will become more loving people. Today we will look at Four Things
Love Does Not Do. Let's hear from a contemporary version—the Message.
I Cor 13:1-6. "If I speak with
human eloquence and angelic ecstasy but don't love, I'm nothing but the
creaking of a rusty gate. If I speak God's Word with power, revealing all his
mysteries and making everything plain as day, and if I have faith that says to
a mountain, "Jump," and it jumps, but I don't love, I'm nothing. If I
give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a
martyr, but I don't love, I've gotten nowhere.
So, no matter what I say, what I believe,
and what I do, I'm bankrupt without Love. Love never gives up. Love cares more
for others than for self. Love doesn't want what it doesn't have. Love doesn't
strut, doesn't have a swelled head, doesn't force itself on others, isn't
always "me first, doesn't fly off the handle, doesn't
keep score of the sins of others, doesn't revel when others grovel, Takes
pleasure in the flowering of truth."
I.
Love does not demand its own way.
In NIV, it reads, "it is not
self-seeking." In ESV, "It doesn't insist on its own way."
Have you been in a business meeting
where one person insists on having their way, refuses to listen to other points
of view, and says, "it is my way or the High Way, I am out of here?"
Unfortunately, this insisting on having their way for selfish reasons happens
everywhere, at home, in marriages, among friends, and even in the family of God,
the Church.
The Corinthian Church was fighting
and arguing over seemingly trivial matters. To address this problem of
insistence, Paul said, "Love doesn't demand or insist its own way? Does it
mean that we should never insist on a particular way or take a firm stand? It
is never a loving thing when Christians fight, argue, or quarrel to prove a
point; instead, of living together in unity.
Paul didn't mean; Love never insists
on a particular way. In some incidents, Paul insisted on God's way, and other
times he did not demand his own way. For instance, Paul took a firm stand on
the truth and publicly rebuked Peter. In the earlier days of God's outpouring
on Gentiles, Peter was eating freely and openly with the Gentile believers in
Antioch.
But when some friends of James came,
he stopped eating with Gentiles, fearing criticism. As a result, Peter's
hypocrisy led Barnabas and other Jewish believers astray. Seeing how Peter and
others were not following the truth of the gospel Message, Paul confronted them
by insisting that "a person is only made right with God by their faith in
Christ not by following the ceremonial aspects of the law. (Gal 2:11-16). Here
Paul was adamant and insistent.
There was another occasion about
eating meat offered to the idols. For the sake of certain weak believers, Paul
did not demand his own way. Instead, he was willing to give up his right to eat
meat altogether. (I Cor 8,9). Paul was never insistent on his own rights when
it came to sharing the truth of the Gospel. He tried to find common ground.
At times, Love must insist on a
particular way; at other times, must not insist on its own way." But we
must always keep in mind that my firm stand on a specific matter enhances God’s
Kingdom or my selfish agenda?
II.
Love does not easily get angry
Handling anger is an important life
skill. Christian counselors report that 50 percent of people who come in for
counseling have problems dealing with anger. Anger can shatter communication
and tear apart relationships, and it ruins both the joy and health of many.
Sadly, people tend to justify their anger instead of accepting responsibility
for it.
Everyone struggles, to varying
degrees, with anger. Thankfully, God's Word contains principles regarding handling
anger in a godly way and overcoming sinful anger. The Apostle Paul did
not say Love never gets angry. He said, "Love does not quickly get angry. In
other words, love is not quick-tempered or doesn’t fly off the handle. If love
is not easily angered, then a person with a "short fuse," who becomes
angry quickly, is not showing Love.
Anger itself is not sinful but can
quickly lead to sinful expressions. For this reason, Paul wrote to the
Ephesians, "'In your anger do not sin': Do not let the sun go down while
you are still angry" (Ephesians 4:26). There are times when we become
angry, yet we are called to express our anger in non-sinful, constructive ways.
Love will guide us in the proper handling of anger.
Being hot-tempered usually involves
making snap judgments, seeking to pay back, and refusing a second chance. However,
true Love refuses to jump to quick conclusions, take revenge, or hastily judge
anyone. Think about how God has been patient with us and given us many
opportunities to return to him and get things right. How do you deal with your
hot temper?
Follow what the Scripture says
instead of rashly saying that you will never be angry. "Understand this,
my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak,
and slow to get angry." (James 1:19) Psalm 86:15, "But you, O Lord, are
a God of compassion and mercy, slow to get angry and filled with unfailing love
and faithfulness. "May the Lord fill us with His unfailing love and make us
more patient and kinder so that we can control our anger.
III.
Love does not keep records of wrongs (doesn't keep score of the sins of others)
Don't be a scorekeeper of other
people's wrongs. That is not loving. But how often do we keep score of other's
mistakes? In a conflict situation, we quickly say, "you always do this or
that." Really? How often was an offense committed at you? Twice, or thrice,
but not always?
The News Media is brutal when it
comes to keeping the records of the wrongs, mainly of politicians. They vilify
them by saying how many thousands of lies they have told. That is not very
loving. Is there anyone who has never done a wrong thing here? How about if
only God kept a record of all the bad things we have ever done and publicized
it to the world?
That would become a New York Times
Bestseller. But because of His abundant love for us, He erases all our sins and
remembers them no more each time we confess them to Him. Consider these
scriptures: Psalm 130: 3-4, "Lord, if you kept a record of our sins, who,
O Lord, could ever survive? But you offer forgiveness that we might learn to
fear you."
Because God is gracious, He doesn't
punish us according to our sins. Psalm 103:10-12, "He does not punish us
for all our sins; he does not deal harshly with us, as we deserve. For his
unfailing love toward those who fear him is as great as the height of the
heavens above the earth. He has removed our sins as far from us as the east is
from the west."
God is like a loving father to us, tender
and compassionate to those who fear him. If God doesn't keep a record of our
sins and treat us as our sins deserve, what business do we have to keep score
of the sins of others? True Love doesn't keep records of the wrongs of others.
Remember how God has been merciful
to you when you are tempted to pull out the list of all the wrong things that
your friend or spouse committed against you. Peter thought he was brilliant
when he asked Jesus, “Lord, how often should I forgive someone who sins against
me? Seven times? “No, not seven times,” Jesus replied, “but seventy times seven.”
Matt18:21-22
IV.
Love does not rejoice about Injustice but rejoices with the truth.
When the apostle Paul wrote these words, he
may have addressed the elders condoning the behavior of a man living in sin
with his stepmother. (ch 5). Instead of removing that man from the fellowship
by showing him the truth, they tolerated that evil and even boasted about it.
On the other hand, God, who is Love,
will not rejoice with evil, let alone tolerate it. Instead, He wants to purge
it from the lives of His beloved children and the Church. Similarly, He wants
His Children of Love to do the same wherever they see evil lifting its ugly
head.
As children of God, when we tolerate evil or
Injustice in the Church or anywhere, it is equivalent to rejoicing over it.
Proverbs 4:13-15, “Take hold of my instructions; don’t let them go. Guard them,
for they are the key to life. Don’t do as the wicked do, and don’t follow the
path of evildoers. Don’t even think about it; don’t go that way. Turn away and
keep moving.”
What happens when you let that kind
of evil continue in a congregation like the Corinthian Church? Like a bit of
yeast that spreads through the whole batch of dough, that evil can corrupt the
entire Church. Therefore, instead of rejoicing with sin, we must tackle it by
holding up the truth of God’s word. In other words, we must speak up when we
see Injustice.
In the Inter-Faith Clergy Martin
Luther King’s Day celebration, we read Dr. King's letter from the Birmingham
Jail. Here is a quote: "Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice
everywhere. We are caught in an inescapable network of mutuality, tied in a
single garment of destiny. Whatever affects one directly affects all
indirectly."[1]
We are interconnected with one another.
Our acts of Love or lack thereof
affect all of us. Let us live out the true Love of God in our Church and
community. Love does not demand its own way, not easily get angry. It does not
keep records of wrongs. Love
does not rejoice about Injustice but rejoices with the truth. Amen!
