Building A Christ-Centered Home
When
we hear the word "home," we get mixed responses, depending on our
childhood experiences and the current experiences at Home. What is a home? The
dictionary defines Home as "the
place where one lives permanently, especially as a member of a family or
household." These days, there is no guarantee of permanency or belonging
to a family or household due to the breakdown of families and households. There
is so much homelessness in our world.
The real Home is more than a physical structure
or a geographical location. It is a place where one experiences love, security,
peace, joy, and feels accepted and valued for who they are. We all have an
inner longing for such a place, and when we find it, we can truly be at Home.
Where can one be truly at Home? How can we
build homes where we experience wholeness? Today in our study, we will learn
about the Biblical understanding of a Home and how we can build a
Christ-Centered Home. Colossians 3:18-21.
I. Biblical Understanding of a Home.
Before
sin ever entered, this was how God envisioned a home to be. Gen 2:24,
"That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife,
and they become one flesh." This was God's view of marriage between a man
and a woman. From that sacred union, other humans emerged, a physical and
spiritual home was formed, and the human race multiplied!
Jesus affirmed the
traditional view of marriage as a union between a man and a woman. Matthew
19:4-6, "that at the beginning the Creator made them
male and female,' and said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and
mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh'? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has
joined together, let no one separate." In this broken world, we may
legalize same sex marriages, within our families we may have same sex
marriages, but that is not how God views marriages.
God's ideal view of
humanity is that a man and a woman will be bonded in marriage and procreate
their offspring. They would construct a home (shelter) together, a place where
they would live with their children and their grandchildren. So, a typical household
consists of a mother, a father, and children. But in this broken world, that is
not always the case; some remain single, some couples are unable to have
children, and some children live in a one-parent home.
Whether you are single,
married with or without children, or a single mom or dad raising children, we
can all, with God's help, build a Christ-centered home or a place where love,
peace, joy, and God's goodness dwell, allowing us to live fulfilling lives. In
our passage, Apostle Paul shares a few principles for parents with children who
aspire to build a Christ-centered home.
II. Building A Christ-Centered Home.
For young parents raising children, numerous helpful tools,
books, and manuals are available. For Christian parents who wish to raise their
children in the ways of God and build a Christ-centered home, there are several
helpful Biblical instructions available. You may be wondering, why everything
has to be either Christ-like or Christ-centered? This week, my wife sent this
quote from Oz Guinness on our family group text, which made a lot of sense: "The
way of Jesus is the highest Shalom, well-being, flourishing for humankind."[1]
Keeping that in mind
Let us
explore these Biblical Instructions: Teaching, Discipline, and Good examples.
1. Teaching Life Lessons Through Casual
Conversations
After living in the bondage of slavery in Egypt for 400 years,
the Israelites were now about to enter the promised land. God gave laws and
commandments to the Israelites, who were forming a new community. Israelites
were to follow them as long as they lived so that they, their children, and
their children may fear the Lord, enjoy a long life, and increase greatly, Deut
6:1-3.
Deut 6:6-9, "These commandments that I give you today are to be on your
hearts. Impress them on your children
or teach them diligently (NASB). Talk about them when you sit at Home and when
you walk along the road, when you lie down, and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads.
Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates."
How can we impress or teach Biblical principles to our children?
The teaching method is
not traditional lecturing, but having a conversation with your children about
all aspects of life. While you are cooking a meal, making a craft with your
children, at the dining table, or driving them to school or sports. Whenever or
wherever! Be spontaneous! Jesus's primary mode of teaching his disciples was
through casual encounters.
Another form of teaching
is answering children's questions. Jewish parents were instructed to answer
their children's questions and explain to them why and what they believed.
(Deut 6:20) Children's questions are important. We need to explain why we do
things the way we do. We also need to recognize their teenage/young adult
years. It is important for us parents not to be rigid, but to ask them
questions and seek to understand. Keep the conversation going!
2. Discipline Your Children With Love.
The Bible has numerous
teachings on the subject of Discipline. The best thing parents can do for their
children is to discipline them. Consider these scriptures, which suggest that
disciplining our children is beneficial. Prov 13:24, "Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but
the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them."
Do you want peace of
mind? Prov 29:17, "Discipline your children, and they will give you peace; they will bring you the delights you desire."
Prov 19:18, Discipline your children while you still have the chance;
indulging them destroys them."
(The Message). Discipline includes teaching them to respect limits and
boundaries. All Discipline must be done in love.
3. Setting Good Examples Before Your Children
I cannot emphasize enough how setting good examples before
our Children is crucial for their overall development and well-being. Children
watch their parents and would want to imitate them. If children observe their
parents constantly quarreling and fighting, they are more likely to grow up
quarreling and fighting. But if they see their parents loving and kind to each
other, hopefully they will turn out to be loving and kind too. Your children
are observing you!
The
world teaches men to be misogynistic, women to be feminist, and children to be
rebellious. In contrast to those secular values, Paul laid out four Christlike
values for Christian households. 1. "Wives, understand and support your husbands by submitting to them
in ways that honor the Master. 2. Husbands,
go all out in love for your wives. Don't take
advantage of them (don't be harsh with them, NIV). 3 Children,
do what your parents tell you. 4. Parents,
don't come down too hard on your children, or
you'll crush their spirits."
It takes both the husband and wife and children
working together, applying these Christ-like values to build a Christ-centered
home. Such households will find God's love among the members of the family,
Joy, Peace, Harmony, and wholeness. I have a word for the singles!
If you are single for any reason, don't feel
disadvantaged. The Apostle Paul, being single, writing to the Corinthian
church, acknowledges both singleness and marriage as gifts from God and
encourages contentment. As Paul noted, singles are better off when it comes to
pleasing and serving the Lord, as they are not encumbered by those who are
married and raising families.
Singles can also be Christ-like and build
Christ-centered homes. I know how hard and challenging it is to be single. I
know a godly Jewish, Christian woman who has never been married and is longing
to be married. She is in her eighties. She is Christ-like and has made her Home
Christ-centered. She opens her Home for hospitality and disciples younger
women.
